After the age of 70, never let anyone do this to you
Reaching the age of 70 doesn’t mean a person has lost their value or abilities. Yet many older adults experience a quiet shift: their opinions are ignored, decisions are made for them, and their knowledge is overlooked—all under the guise of “care” or concern.
This phenomenon, known as infantilization, often begins subtly. People start speaking in a softer, childlike tone, question choices, and override decisions with phrases like “it’s for your own good” or “at your age, you shouldn’t be doing that anymore.” While intentions may be good, the effects can be harmful.
Infantilization signals that older adults are perceived as incapable of thinking, deciding, or managing their own lives. It often stems from fear, misplaced concern, or societal ageism that equates aging with decline rather than experience. Over time, this erodes confidence and autonomy.
Research shows that older adults who continue making decisions live longer and enjoy a higher quality of life. Engaging the brain through planning, problem-solving, and even making mistakes keeps motivation and vitality alive. When people feel unheard, passivity grows, creating a cycle of diminishing control.
When control comes from family members, the effects worsen. Children or partners may confuse protection with dominance, leading older adults to surrender choices slowly—from small matters to major life decisions—until they no longer recognize themselves.
This can lead to internalized ageism, where repeated messages like “you’re too old for that” become self-beliefs. Over time, older adults may unconsciously limit their own actions and capacity, reinforcing dependence and self-doubt.
Breaking this cycle requires asserting boundaries, challenging assumptions, and making decisions independently. Each choice strengthens autonomy, allowing older adults to reclaim control over their health, voice, and dignity.
After 70, life still belongs to the individual. Experience remains valuable, and the right to decide for oneself should never be surrendered. Maintaining agency is not just about independence—it is essential for self-respect, mental stimulation, and a meaningful life.