JOKE OF THE DAY: An old man calls his son and says, \”Listen, your mother and I are getting divorced. Forty-five years of misery is enough.\” \”Dad, what are you talking about?\” the son shouts. \”We can\’t stand each other anymore,\” the old man replies. \”I\’m tired of seeing her face, and I\’m done talking about this. Call your sister and let her know,\” and he hangs up. The son, now worried, calls his sister. \”What? They\’re getting divorced?!\” she exclaims. She immediately calls their father. \”You are NOT getting divorced! My brother and I are flying home tomorrow to talk this through. Until then, don\’t call a lawyer or sign anything. DO YOU HEAR ME?\” She hangs up. The old man turns to his wife and says…

An elderly couple had just settled into bed when the old man let out a loud fart and proudly declared, “Seven points!”

His wife, puzzled, rolled over and asked, “What are you talking about?”

“Football,” he replied. “That was a touchdown!”

Not wanting to be left out, his wife waited a few moments, then let out a fart of her own and announced, “Touchdown! Tie game!”

After a brief pause, the old man fired off another one and boasted, “Aha! 14 to 7—I’m back in the lead!”

Giggling, his wife responded with a little toot and said, “Extra point! We’re tied again!”

The night continued with playful back-and-forth, each sound marking a new score, until both were laughing too hard to keep count.

Their lighthearted competition turned bedtime into their favorite game—a silly